Monday, April 16, 2012

Its Good to Be Back!

I have to apologize.  I knew when I started the blog, that it was a dangerous time to start a new project.  I was 36 weeks pregnant and knew that my time would be limited really soon.  I wanted to start it all the same, and so I did.  Now some 10 weeks later and a new baby sitting next to me, I am slowly but surely getting back to all those to-do's.

Last week was my first week back to work and it seems fitting then that I get my blog back up and running too.  I couldn't have a veterinary blog and not mention my children though, as they shape me as veterinarian and visa versa.  For me life isn't divided into nice little seperate pieces one aspect of my life always seems to influences the other pieces or in a more messy way they spill and splatter carelessly back and forth.

When I was a little girl, and even a teenager I never really thought about children.  I didn't babysit.  I was the youngest in the family so there was no younger sibling to take care of.  Friends of mine would be drawn to children at social functions, I was drawn to animals.  I rarely if ever thought about having children but often thought of my career as a veterinarian.  Any maternal feelings were I had were typically placed onto the care of pets and stray animals.

I focused from high-school and then eight years of school on becoming a veterinarian.  I had a social life I enjoyed, and later a husband.  I still didn't think much about children.  I don't know if I just had enough on my plate at the time, or the idea hadn't come to the surface.  I simply kept on working (which was plenty) and moving forward.  Why the need to have children came to us, I don't know.  I blame it on age and biology.  Luckily though it did because I most say they are my greatest accomplisment to date.  It also brings my husband and I our greatest joy.

That being said, one of the gifts my daughters have given me is that they have helped me realize how truely blessed I am to be a veterinarian.  Thats not to say that I don't love being a mother and love being at home with them every chance that I get.  But it because both my pregnancies had major complications, I was forced to take 5 months off with each one.  The longest periods of time that I have ever had not working in my adult life.

 During my time away I do my best to keep busy (as busy as you can be in a NICU or on bedrest).  And I sobbed for days before I have to go back to work and leave my daughters at home while I go back to work.  All the same, both times after being gone, it all comes back to me the moment I enter an exam room.

I have been blessed to find a profession that I truely love.  The joy of talking to clients, the patient with a happy tail or a quick tongue, it all comes back in a flash.  I can lose myself in my work and quickly become engrossed in complicated cases, and the simple routine of a veterinary practice.  I am eager to see the day move on and keep people and the pets happy and healthy.  This is the profession I wanted and dreamed it to be, and I know that there are many people out there that have never been as lucky as I to find their true passion.

The days and nights of a working mom are long, exhausting, and more than a little emotional.  Overall though, doing the best I can both at home and at work makes me a better person and stronger veterinarian.